Friday, March 7, 2014

It's Really Too Bad

Why don't human beings talk out differences, pet peeves, troublesome issues? We would rather hold on to our irritation, resentment, disgust, anger, dislike, offense, etc. then talk it out – get it out in the open, so changes can be made and relationships can be resolved.
I’ve been so guilty of this, but I think I’m getting better. I am trying to say how I feel or what I’m upset about as soon as I can, but I’m still very far away from talking over some issues with some individuals. So, what is it we’re afraid of?
Sometimes, I think I might make the situation worse. I think that if I say what’s on my mind, the individual will be totally insulted and then won’t speak to me for sure. In some cases that would be a true loss but in other cases I know that harboring the anger is much worse than losing the relationship. Often it’s how we say something than what we say. It’s difficult for sure.
Sometimes, I think the other person may not want to discuss the issue because they don’t like me anyway. That, I know, is assumption, and we all know what it means to assume. So, that’s not really a good excuse for getting it (the problem) out in the open.
Regardless of the reason, not talking promotes harboring of many unhealthy feelings that can sometimes (depending on the relationship) lead to health issues. Some relationships are toxic and should be evaluated and analyzed, but some relationships just need a little mending ~ like a good hashing out of concerns.
Maybe, that will be my Lenten  promise, to be kind by letting people know right away when I’m either saddened or upset by something they have said or done, and then maybe they will feel comfortable telling me when I’ve said or done something they didn’t like.

It’s a good thought. 


Hailey Yankowski said...

I have also been thinking about this lately. I have lost many friendships because I could not stand certain things they did. This topic is a cause and effect because the pet peeves and troublesome differences in a relationship result in negative feelings toward one another in the relationship and can even end the relationship entirely of the people involved don't discuss the issue. If the people discuss the issue, it can result in the relationship flourishing because the other is aware that they do something that annoys the other.

Natala Orobello said...

My point exactly. I wish we would feel comfortable talking out our differences, but even as I write this I know there are circumstances when and where I would not feel comfortable.